Tag Archives: love

Lover, Lover, Lover

25 Jan

I’ve started to cry. When I read a story, or watch a movie… When it gets emotional, I cry. I never used to do that. I think it might be good, but there’s at least a possibility that it’s not. What if it’s just because I’m fragile? What if it’s not that I’m opening my mind; becoming more imaginative?

(Duele no tenerte cerca)

Why does this have to be? More unanswerable questions. I just can never quite tell when you’re telling the truth or when you’re protecting me… When you’ll be okay or when I’ll hurt you. Everything blurs together. It’s just one dilemma after another.

(Duele no escuchar tu voz)

I have to fill in the blanks. Make the pieces fit together. Once everything sticks things will be okay, and I can see that now, and that’s progress, I suppose.

(Duele respirar tu ausencia, pero…)

All I want to do is make you happy. Make everyone happy. Why can’t I do both at the same time? Why isn’t there enough for that?

(Duele más decirte adiós)

Heat Transfer

7 Sep

Life is so beautiful, sometimes. The fan that made me bleed is running right next to my head and there is a cricket and wind and lightning and I want to run all the way to your house just to show you this. Take you outside and kiss you and then leave, and you would be bleary-eyed and the wind is warm, love, and the lightning is bright, but it’s not here. Something went wrong in the line of things going wrong and suddenly there’s just one moment that’s right.

These are the nights we live, darling; these are the nights we die within ourselves and we fall asleep and rise up entirely new people.

In other news, I was thinking about you. I don’t want you fighting too hard for me. I’m not a good prize. Not good enough for you.


26 Aug

It wasn’t entirely on my mind the way I
Intended it to be.
It happened.

The truth- well, it hurts to say.

So soon after I was so shocked after I was
Awed by how this world
Lets us go; we can try momentarily…
But we get tossed off

This delicacy of interconnectivity- I found it
Satisfying to the extreme, extremes meeting, forming
Circular cycles. Twisted in two, broken and meeting

I can’t stand it.

Aren’t we all?

That was yesterday… The truth- I won’t fight it.

I hope that we can work past the poeticism of this all.

I hope you can see straight now, love, because
I will rock your world
I can defocus your lenses
I should be entwined in your rods and cones.

When the love starts burning, you got to do what’s right.

Bring me back to pressure and passion
Heat kills: my cells slowly dying running sliding screaming
Down your hip.
We say this is precious and toss it away
Like your doubts; I would have
Carried you,
You know.

Treat me no good no more…

I’ll Just Post It Here

30 Jul

A magnetic poem

Not necessarily about today. It could be. It could not be.

I Love It When This Happens

9 Jun

(So close.)

Angels & Airwaves

29 May

Friday morning was rushed & forgetful. No pillow. No paper. No time. Car ride.

And do you ever lay awake at night?
And do you ever tell yourself, ‘Don’t try.’?

Friday itself was comforting, but out of place, somehow. I didn’t have anything. I wasn’t brave enough to do anything. There was no frisbee.

Don’t try to let yourself down… Don’t try to let yourself down.

Friday night was just like I’d remembered it… The depression set in well enough. I was lucky to have Jim. ‘You still awake?’ No answer. Glad?

And do you ever see yourself in love?
And do you ever take a chance, my love?

Saturday morning wasn’t too tired. Breakfast. No writing. Like always.

Because you know that I will… Because you know that I will.

Saturday itself was normality and repetition. Gaining confidence. Skip. Lurch-skip, out-skip. I didn’t know where love was.

So hear this, please; and watch as your heart speeds up endlessly… And look for the stars as the sun goes down- each breath that you take has a thunderous sound…

Saturday night was bottomless black despair. Po-jazz made me glorious… Then po-jazz made me want to break things. Tree. No sleep. Journal. No sleep. Jim. No sleep. Downstairs. No sleep. Sneak. No sleep. Upstairs. No sleep. Journal. No sleep. Need you… No sleep. Then- Run.

Everything, everything’s magic.

Sunday morning was love, and all was right.

Just sit back and hold on, but hold on tight… Prepare for the best and the fastest ride. Reach out your hand and I’ll make you mine-

Sunday itself was an end to many things. Breakfast. No meeting. Bagpipes. Little arranging. Need us…

Everything, everything’s magic.


10 Feb

Hoy día, hablé con Señor. Él dijo que no va a darme crédito extra. (Coño.) Él dijo también que debo investigar mis oportunidades de viajar, especialmente programas de inmersión- vivir en un país que habla mi lengua. (Por favor, ven conmigo a España? Te prometo que Andalucía será [casi] tan bella como tus ojos…)

Él dijo también que le parece que aprendo las lenguas rápidamente y fácilmente, y cuando preguntó lo que quiero hacer después del colegio, me enorgullece decir que voy a continuar mi educación en este tema.